Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
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