I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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