i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
Everytime she tries to call me all I can think about is when she tripped walking down my steps during her walk of shame. Then I laugh until it goes to voicemail
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
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