i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
