I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Randomize
