Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
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His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
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I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
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