I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
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