Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
