Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
No I am not eating basil off your cock
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
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