I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Randomize
