is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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