Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
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