found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
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