come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
So, my ex just showed me the drunk voicemail we left him last night. Started out with me saying "I think it's Shane." Then you took my phone and started singing a song about peanut butter, train tracks, and tequila. I joined in. On the upside, he said he's totally fine with being on the drunk dial list from now on. Soooo, another tequila night??
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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