Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
I don't want my vagina anymore.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
