We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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