ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
Randomize