neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
NoShamevember. You game?
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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