grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
Randomize
