i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
