Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
is it fun? or sober?
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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