Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Randomize
