That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
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