Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
