Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
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