god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
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