Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
Randomize
