Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
