About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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