Nicole vs. Life
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
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