why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
Randomize
