Is it normal to miss your booty call?
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
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