Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Randomize
