super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
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