i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize