She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
