it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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