It was confusing and full of hummus
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
My bed is full of blood and feathers
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Randomize
