420 ftw
id be glad to
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
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