this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
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