I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Randomize
