when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
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