The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
I need mimosas to revive my soul
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
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