Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
so let's talk penis.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
Randomize