if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
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