They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Randomize