After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
The beer is more important than you right now.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
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