We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
Randomize
