Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
