I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
Randomize
