yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
Randomize
